Starting Now

School doesn't start until after Labor Day but due to the summer visitation schedule we're having our last week of summer with Monkey & Peanut. Before they came home today I found myself hoping we could have some relaxing time together without any agenda. That's pretty rare, partly because I don't do so well with just leaving well-enough alone. I like them to be on task, engaged, and learning. Those aren't bad things, by any means, but too much of that structured stuff makes for a stifled childhood.

Not long after getting home, Monkey & Peanut decided to play Mancala but neither remembered the real rules (if they ever knew them.) They were arguing over how to play and who was right. They had decided to give up altogether when I walked into the dining room. Puddin' was happily pushing her stroller around so I stayed to guide them through the rules. I talked them through decisions and helped them figure out strategies. Peanut mentioned that the game is more fun than when she played with her friends. (See - rules and structure CAN lead to fun!) Monkey was captivated by the idea that she had some control, and it wasn't all up to chance. After a successful game they decided to take on the challenge of facing me as a team. They remembered a lot of the strategies we talked about and delighted in trying to trick me. They also managed to work well together and keep good attitudes, which borders on miraculous.

After Mancala they wanted to try a new game so I taught them Crazy 8's. (Puddin' was still happy as a lark putzing about the house or sitting in my lap playing with my cards. She's such a happy toddler.) They caught on pretty quickly and we had a rollicking game. Peanut's attention span isn't quite as developed so she kept drawing when she had a card to play. She got frustrated but with a few reminders she was able to cut the whining and enjoy herself. Luckily for her sake we played open hand so Monkey and I were able to gently guide her to wiser decisions. I had to bend the rules a little towards the end to speed up the play - otherwise we would have been playing all the way up until dinner. I think Monkey and I could have managed that quite easily but the younger two were starting to lose a little patience.

It was a delight to play with the kids. I know how fun they are but I don't always choose to remember. I know how wonderful and good-hearted they are but I don't always allow myself to see it. This is the part of parenting that trips me up over and over again: I have trouble being in the moment that is actually happening right now. I'm always planning ahead, looking forward, searching for ramifications or consequences. I'm missing out on a lot of good things happening around me everyday. There are very good things here in our now. I want to cement these images in my memory so I choose play more often but even that is forward thinking. Instead, I will simply say this - I enjoyed today. Today I love my kids. Today was a good day.

The Prodigal Son

The Prodigal Son
2005 Petite Syrah, Paso Robles
Big House Wines

Ripe, farm-stand berries; mellow tannins and relatively light body; a little bit of crisp finish. The Prodigal Son is a wonderful choice for a casual dinner (we had it with veggie pizza) or for sitting to enjoy a summer evening. The screw-cap makes this a great portable choice. Drink it down quickly, though. Some reds can hold up a few days after opening but this one tastes best right when opened.

Big House makes a range of wines, most of which are good for everyday drinking. Generally, they have been good but not outstanding. Drinking The Prodigal Son has been a surprisingly good experience and now I'm hoping to re-taste the whole line. For some extra fun check out the website. These guys enjoy life and make a point of bringing fun into every aspect of their wine.

Giving up and giving in

We're finally starting to work through the rough transition points and edge back toward the reasonably well-ordered household we are at our peak. One of the transitions we're facing has to do with how Monkey & Peanut interact with Puddin'. Down South, Monkey & Peanut got to man-handle their younger cousins (2 1/2 and almost a year) however they wished. The boys' mom isn't as neurotic on the issue as I am. Monkey & Peanut came back expecting to treat Puddin' the same way. I'm trying hard to trust them with more responsibility and they've agreed to abide by some short term guidelines (there has to be a parent watching if you want to pick her up). It's hard for me to let them make mistakes with my baby. I don't want them making decisions for MY baby. I want to raise her the way I want. When I'm honest with myself I have to admit that part of it is trying to avoid their mom's influence on my daughter as much as possible. It's petty, I know - I'm working on it.

They're also asking for more opportunities like putting Puddin' to bed. No! I'm not ready to give it up yet! I want to keep that to myself! I already have to share with Stan; isn't that enough? During the school year and while they were gone this summer I was Puddin's only consistent playmate. She didn't want to go with anyone else and Mama reigned supreme. Now that Monkey & Peanut are here during the day I don't get to spend much play time with her. She's playing with her sisters nearly every waking moment and delighted by everything they do. I know it's really good for all three of them. I'll also admit that it allows me more time, and keeps me a little more centered in the adult world. I miss being the center of Puddin's world though. All those times that I felt on the outs in my household I comforted myself with the idea that at least one of the kids was with me no matter what.

I've blogged before about the need to get out of the way and let Stan be Dad. By choosing to loosen my grip on Puddin' I allow Monkey & Peanut to work on their own relationships with her. Once again, I find myself pushed to give up what I want for the good of the rest of the family. I have a sneaking suspicion this one is good for me too but I'm not willing to admit that just yet.

Fallen Bread

I used to be an avid bread baker. In a world of just barely post-college kids, that kind of domesticity was unique so I gained a reputation. Folks banded together for one of my birthdays to give me a bread maker and slowly, but surely, I stopped making bread. I love bread - it's one of my top five foods. I love fresh bread, especially; but using a machine took all the fun out for me. There's just something about getting my hands in the dough, massaging and pounding until the texture transforms. It's probably the closest I'll ever get to sculpture, which is a very alluring art form.

Recently I started making bread again. I have an 800 page bread cookbook that talked me into it, despite the soaring summer temps. The last few loaves have been lovely so today I took a detour to wheat bread. It's a little harder to activate the gluten in wheat flour so wheat breads can be quite finicky. This particular recipe was a "batter" bread, which doesn't require kneading. It seemed odd, given the gluten problem, but the book told me to do it; who was I to argue? The lack of kneading already took some of my fun away but it seemed like a good solution since Puddin' was fighting naptime. The dough took much longer to rise than the recipe said - already a bad sign - and then fell during baking. I now have a brick of wheat bread with the density of a sponge and the texture of cardboard. The taste isn't bad but it's got a lot to compensate for and doesn't come close to the task.

I'm going to be on the lookout for ways to repurpose the bread. If you've got any suggestions I'd love to hear them.

A Bit of Bubbly

I was cooking a recipe on Thursday that called for sparkling wine. We have a few bottles on hand, one of which is a bottle of Veuve Clicquot, vintage 1996. (Most Champagne is not vintage specific. They mix grapes from previous years in for blend and quality control.) Vintage Champagne isn't usually a splurge I go for but I got this bottle on deep clearance a few years back. The place I bought the wine isn't one known for it's long-term storage or proper care of the good stuff. We've had quite a few occasions worth celebrating but I never knew if the wine was still any good so I wouldn't take the risk. I decided that our final night as a threesome for the summer was good enough reason to pop it open without much risk.

Yum. Yummmm. I'm not going to try and analyze it for you; all I can say is that folks who obsess over good Champagne are right. I've never been a huge fan of bubbly and now I know it's because I just wasn't drinking the right stuff. Smooth, dry yet still flavorful, subtle fruit, and a tart kick to finish it off. This could get me addicted to the good life, if I weren't so frugal. Some might think that such a fine wine would be wasted on a mundane Thursday, and maybe those folks have a point. But I'm glad I got the chance to celebrate my everyday life with such glorious treat. I hope that you'll find some extravagent (but not costly) way to celebrate the good in your life too.